


Awfully Fond of You

by relic_amaranth



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff, Gender-neutral Reader, M/M, Other, Reader-Insert, Romance, Rubber Ducks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-25
Updated: 2018-05-25
Packaged: 2019-05-13 12:53:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,042
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14749235
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/relic_amaranth/pseuds/relic_amaranth
Summary: Oh rubber duckie, you’re the one…capable of confusing an angel to frustration. Castiel just wants to know what rubber ducks are for. Cue shenanigans until you can set the angel straight.





	Awfully Fond of You

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: I have no idea where this came from. I admit I have a fondness for rubber ducks (I used to collect different ones and even now I have a platoon that hangs out in my bathroom) but one night I thought of that quote from one of the “Harry Potter” movies and all I could think of was that Cas would totally agree with Mr. Weasley. And then this happened. Please enjoy.

 

_“Tell me– what exactly is the function of a rubber duck?”_

“That,” Cas says. “Is an excellent question.”

Sam stifles a laugh and you barely do the same. Dean rolls his eyes. “Google it, Cas.”

Cas frowns suspiciously. You can sympathize– anytime Dean tells you to look something up on the internet you have a self-made rule to try and get the answer in any other way. Failing that, safe search must be on, and your eyes glaze over pictures out of a well-earned sense of self-preservation.

Cas looks to you. You start to answer but Dean shoots you a glare and you roll your eyes. For someone who complained that “Harry Potter” was for kids, he’s really gotten into this. “Later,” you whisper and cuddle closer, and Cas puts his arm around you to hold you better in silent agreement. 

 

“Hey,” Sam says the next morning when you stumble into the kitchen to get your caffeine fix.

“Hey,” you manage to grumble and search for a mug so you don’t have to use the coffeepot. You will if you have to, but you’ll try for civility first.

“I saw Cas this morning,” Sam chuckles and hands you a clean cup. “I guess you two had a good night?”

“Oh. Yeah.” You smile at the thought as you pour yourself a cup and down half of it. The coffee, and the leftover haze of a very good evening, combine to help put you in a better mood.

“No details please.” You can’t see Sam’s distasteful forehead crinkle, but you’ve been friends long enough that you can hear it. “I just wanted to let you know that goodwill might have been sort of…wrecked this morning.”

It’s too early to have to think. So you go with the obvious. “What did Dean do now?” At least, you hope it’s Dean and not Gabe. It’s a lot harder to beat up an archangel than a human. You’ll do it, but you hope you don’t have to.

Thankfully (sort of), Sam shrugs in the way he does when Dean is being embarrassing. “Cas was asking about rubber ducks again and Dean was refusing to tell him. It might have been the dumbest argument I have _ever_ witnessed, and that’s including the Feather Boa Debate.”

You hide your face in your cup. That was maybe not your finest moment, and so, okay, you can understand how a really dumb thing with Dean can turn into something high-stakes. However. “Why didn’t _you_ just tell Cas then?”

Sam blushes. “Dean pulls out his blackmail for the weirdest things. I, uh, I’m not allowed to tell Cas. Ever.”

You roll your eyes. “It’s okay. He’ll get over it,” you say, pat Sam’s shoulder, and wander off to take a shower.

 

You’re sitting in a library with Gabriel and Cas, waiting for word from Sam and Dean. A simple hunt has taken a weird turn and you’re not sure of all the details but there might be grigori involved and that’s making both Cas and Gabe stand on edge. You don’t disturb them, but you do place yourself close to Cas. You haven’t seen him much lately so it’s nice to just be in his presence.

“Gabriel,” Cas says, breaking the silence with a curious tone. “What is a rubber duck for?”

You lift your head from your book. Gabe isn’t altogether a terrible person to ask that– he most certainly knows the answer– however relying on his puckish mood is a dangerous proposition.

Yeah, that smirk on Gabe’s face is not going to do anyone any favors. As if he knows what you’re thinking, he transfers himself to sit on the table between you and Cas, blocking him from your sight and vice versa. “I’ll tell you, but first– what do you _think_ a rubber duck is for?”

“I cannot even begin to guess,” Cas says.

“Come on, _try_ ,” Gabe wheedles. “Think of the form: bright yellow, round. What does that make you think of?”

“A warning.”

This isn’t right. But you muffle a laugh anyways. Gabe keeps up appearances with his serious, “Right, right, that’s a good guess,” but you can hear the laugh in his tone. Asshole. “What about the shape and feel? The squishiness?”

“It’s squishy?” Cas sounds _concerned_ and you have to bite down on your hand to keep yourself contained.

The tone of the room changes in an instant– Gabriel jumps off the table and he and Cas look like they’re listening to something. You’re up, grabbing your jacket. “Time to go?”

“Grigori,” Cas says. His jaw tightens. “More than one.” He looks at you and he had _better_ not say what you think he– “Stay here.”

“Cas, we discussed this. I’m going,” you say and hold up your angel blade. “Let’s go.”

“It’s too dangerous. No,” Cas says and _grabs Gabriel’s shirt_ , disappearing with the bewildered archangel in hand.

“Cas! CAS!” you yell but several minutes of shouting his name, Gabriel’s name, and every curse you can think of, do nothing to bring either angel back. You wonder if Cas would squeak like a rubber duck if you wrapped your hands around his throat. It’s looking like a worthy experiment.

 

When Cas does show his face again he grovels for three straight days before you think you might be acting a little unfair. You’re both in the hallway when your angry resolve cracks and when you turn you are met with the saddest blue eyes you have maybe ever seen. You sigh. “All right, Cas,” you acquiesce. “But don’t you _ever_ do that to me again.”

“I won’t,” he says, expression filling with relief. As you move to hug him, though, he pulls out a little, yellow, plastic piece of…

Did he just…

Did he seriously just apologize to satisfy his curiosity about that dumb fucking _toy_?

“Sam, Dean, and Gabriel all refuse to tell me,” he says, apparently unaware of your mood souring by the second. “Will you _please_ tell me what this is for?”

You force a smile like it’s being manually arranged by unseen hands jerking the expression into place. “Here,” you say and hold out your hand for it. He places it on your palm and you take a moment to look it over. It’s cute and customized with a little trench coat and tie. Gabriel must have gotten it for him. You hold it up, place it against the wall–

And stab your angel blade into it, pinning the deflated little shit right into place.

Cas blinks and you let out a frustrated huff before storming off.

 

Cas doesn’t bring up the rubber ducks again. And he actually manages a real apology after a week of you refusing to talk to him–though you think it’s more effective that you keep going on hunts without telling him where you are until after you’re done. But he apologizes, you forgive him, and life is as normal as a human-angel romance can be. Which is, oftentimes, very normal. Like now– you’re settled in together on your bed and watching shows on your computer while you alternate between reading and making out, depending on whether one (or both) of you get bored.

It’s a good night.

Until Dean pops his head in, grinning in a way that sets off your warning bells. “Hey Cas,” he says far too innocently to be genuine. “How’s the rubber duckie research coming?”

Cas stiffens and glowers at the hunter, who laughs and walks away. Leaving you with a now pissy angel of the lord who is too busy using his lips to pout to do any kissing. You curse Dean and sigh. “Do you want me to–”

“I’ll be back later,” Cas says and disappears.

You roll your eyes and lay back in your bed. Dean would tease him forever if he knew what he caused but it’s not as simple as ‘Cas doesn’t understand this one tiny thing’. Cas is always stuck in the realm of knowing too much about humanity to really relate to other angels and not knowing enough about humans that he can’t help but be reminded that he _isn’t_ human. It’s an outsider-imposter thing that even Gabe still struggles with sometimes, but that Cas is still so new to that it rubs him raw.

But that’s a bigger issue that will take time. _This_ little issue is a pain in the ass that needs to end now, before you and Cas end up in the dumbest couple fight of all time.

What to do.

You get a quick idea and decide to act on it. The next day, you find Gabe hanging out in the library, tormenting Sam with floating books that are just too far out of reach for the resident giant. A smile slips onto your face before you quickly cover it up. “Hey, Sam, go take a break. I need to talk to Gabriel,” you say, giving them both a polite smile. Sam rolls his eyes and leaves immediately, wishing you good luck, while Gabe looks you up and down.

“You know,” he says and turns to go. “I just remembered I have a thing I have to–”

You grab him and pull him back before he can take off. “You remember that favor you owe me?”

Gabe turns shrewd immediately, but doesn’t bolt. “What did you have in mind?”

Your smile turns more genuine and you pull out the short list you’ve made. “This, for tonight, please and thank you.”

 

You lean back in the warm water and sigh. After Gabriel had had his little laughing fit, he had been very accommodating to your requests– he got you an even nicer hotel room than you had asked for, and even offered to run interference with the Winchesters to give you and Cas an uninterrupted night together.

Speaking of…

Cas stands in the bathroom doorway and stares. You can’t blame him– you’re in a large, decadent bathtub, water up to your collarbone, and the surface is completely covered in rubber ducks. It takes him a second to react, and when he does it isn’t favorable.

He scowls and turns to leave.

“Wait!” you say. He stops so you lean on the side of the tub, scooting the floating toys away. “Nobody has really gotten a chance to tell you what rubber ducks are, so I figured I’d show you."

He turns back around and stares. And stares. He tilts his head to one side and squints, like there's some mystery to be unlocked. You open your arms. “This. This is it.”

“But…they’re not doing anything,” he says cautiously, like there’s a trick coming. Do you look like Gabriel? Yeesh.

“Exactly.” You hold one up and squeeze it. It makes a tiny squeak. “They’re bath toys. Or decorative. They don’t _do_ anything.”

“Oh.” Cas looks disappointed.

You grin at the adorable pout on his face. “Don’t get me wrong. They’re cute, and they squeak when you squeeze them, but otherwise they’re pretty much useless. Terrible company, no matter how many you have.” You smile at him as alluring as you can manage and move back. “Care to join me?”

He considers this and raises an eyebrow at the plastic menagerie. With a hand wave the ducks are gone, but for the one in your hand. In another instant Cas is in the tub, just as bare as you and slotting his body between your legs as he presses you against the back of the tub. Skin and porcelain make an odd but strangely comfortable vise.

“You know…you’re very cute,” Cas says conversationally. He pinches your side and you yelp. He smirks. “And make adorable noises.”

You frown at him. Before you can speak, Cas kisses you and even when his lips part from yours he stays that close, cheek pressed to yours as he takes the rubber duck and sets in on the soap shelf. “You do a great many things, however, and right now, I’m interested in all of…one of them.”

You lick your lips and he comes back for another kiss. And another. And then…well, it turns out that rubber duckies aren’t the only things that make bath time lots of fun. 


End file.
